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Well, hot-diggity-damn, BlackBerry's KEYone is one hell of a comeback

24-Hour TestMuch, much more than a nostalgia trip

Need the toilet? Wanna watch a video ad about erectile dysfunction?

Something for the Weekend, Sir?Please now wash your hands

Just how screwed is IT at the Home Office?

Ageing systems, Brexit, exodus of contractors, delayed agile projects...

BOFH: This is your last chance. After this, there is no turning back

James has entered the bastardly matrix. Illustrations from SStock, text from The Reg
Business

Dell EMC courts HPE sales people with putrid Monty Python parody

'Green Knight' - aka HPE - says it's more agile after cutting itself in half with a light sabre
01 May 08:02
Business

KickassTorrents kicked out again, this time by Australia

Court deems the site's for copyright infringement, orders DNS blocks
01 May 07:02
Personal Tech

Huawei used cheap-as-chips chips in some P10s, now buyers want to boil it in oil

Head of consumer orders staff into stores on May day to have salt rubbed into wounds
01 May 05:04
Software

Rejoice, for Linux 4.11 has been delivered!

It's a big release for storage, shared memory, CPU speed boosts and touchy-feely types
01 May 03:50
Security

40,000 Tinder pics scraped into big data service

Trove then disappears, as folks point out the privacy problem
01 May 01:57
Software

UEFI secure boot booted from Debian 9 'Stretch'

Final release sprint decides to take a hurdle off the track
01 May 00:32

Don't miss Sneaky 'fileless' malware flung at Israeli targets via booby-trapped Word docs

DevOps

DevOps and containers heavyweights' London meetup: Under 3 weeks to go

The best agenda in town
27 Apr 13:17
Storage

Big mistake by Big Blue: Storwize initialisation USBs had malware

The IBM arrays are okay, but the PC you used to set up the array might be in trouble
30 Apr 23:27
Security

CIA tracked leakers with hilariously bad Web beacon trick

WikiLeaks finds the spooks' work experience kids' Scribbles
30 Apr 23:03
Policy

Don't listen to the doomsayers – DRM is headed for the historical dustbin, says Doctorow

InterviewSurprising signs of hope, and a few of danger
35 Comments
29 Apr 13:02
Bootnotes
Mats Jarlstrom, pointing to a traffic light camera

'I feel violated': Engineer who pointed out traffic signals flaw fined for 'unlicensed engineering'

InterviewWelcome to the crazy world of Oregon state law
156 Comments
29 Apr 07:05
Policy

It's a question worth asking: Why is the FCC boss being such a jerk?

Special reportThe answer – because net-neutrality slayer Ajit Pai wants to stay in charge
31 Comments
28 Apr 22:53
Security
spying

NSA pulls plug on some email spying before Congress slaps it down

UpdatedCurious time to stop listening to Americans talking about foreigners, eh, Donald?
16 Comments
28 Apr 21:54
Personal Tech

Bullyboy Apple just blew a $500m hole in our wallet, cries Qualcomm

Chip biz says Cook's crew has commanded tech world to withhold patent dosh
23 Comments
28 Apr 20:59
Software

Apache OpenOffice: Not dead yet, you'll just have to wait until mid-May for mystery security fixes

Reference to vulns suddenly vanishes after El Reg probe
30 Comments
28 Apr 19:33
Software

O (n^2) Canada! Code bugs knacker buses, TV, broadband, phone lines

Like their hockey teams, Canadian systems went down this week eh
24 Comments
28 Apr 19:13
Security

Linux Mint-using terror nerd awaits sentence for training Islamic State

Paranoid fella hid operating system, weapons manuals in USB drive cufflinks, no less
66 Comments
28 Apr 17:54
Storage

Fancy a toothpicked-rollmop from our storage smorgasbord?

All the bits and pieces: It's like the three-day weekend has come early
28 Apr 16:36
Site News

Another career suicide as reporter leaves The Register for broadcaster

'He was the most talented and handsome man we have ever worked with,' mourns office
49 Comments
28 Apr 16:02
Networks

M6 crowned crappiest motorway for 4G signal

Now to find out if it has fewer crashes...
44 Comments
28 Apr 15:24
Internet of Things

A sensible Internet of Things investment house? Breed Reply looks like it

So far, no silly Bluetooth toothbrushes
28 Apr 15:02
Cloud

Microsoft's Azure cloud feels the pinch in price war with Amazon's AWS

AnalysisAh, the old 'Windows upsell' one-two
28 Apr 14:07
Policy
sir_humphrey_screengrab_648

Just how screwed is IT at the Home Office?

Ageing systems, Brexit, exodus of contractors, delayed agile projects...
46 Comments
28 Apr 13:28
Personal Tech
BlackBerry KeyONE Android smartphone

Well, hot-diggity-damn, BlackBerry's KEYone is one hell of a comeback

24-Hour TestMuch, much more than a nostalgia trip
64 Comments
28 Apr 13:02
Security
Hacker

Sneaky 'fileless' malware flung at Israeli targets via booby-trapped Word docs

Spies, bank raiders gravitate to growing stealth technique
16 Comments
28 Apr 12:27
Bootnotes

Apple fanbois are officially sheeple. Yes, you heard. Deal with it

Offended? Go hassle Merriam-Webster, not us
66 Comments
28 Apr 12:02
BOFH

BOFH: This is your last chance. After this, there is no turning back

Episode 6Fly, little bird, fly....
67 Comments
28 Apr 11:25
Policy

Just delete the internet – pr0n-blocking legislation receives Royal Assent

Oh, and voting is the only say you get in how the government handles your information
132 Comments
28 Apr 11:02
Business

It's paydaygeddon! NatWest account transfers 'disappearing' (not really)

Thousands left terrified worrying about limiting their beer intake this month
31 Comments
28 Apr 10:47
Business

Need the toilet? Wanna watch a video ad about erectile dysfunction?

Something for the Weekend, Sir?Please now wash your hands
84 Comments
28 Apr 10:22
Storage

Oh lordy, WD just SCHOOLED Seagate in running a disk drive biz

AnalysisLooks like revenues are up by almost $6bn
14 Comments
28 Apr 09:32
Software

Flatpak and Snaps aren't destined for graveyard of failed Linux tech yet

Independence from distros
24 Comments
28 Apr 09:06
Business

Facebook and Google gobble '99 per cent of new digital ad cash'

Ad biz disputes claims, but duopoly marches on
19 Comments
28 Apr 08:36
Security

Last year's ICO fines would be 79 times higher under GDPR

TalkTalk's £400,000 penalty was big – how about £59 MILLION?
28 Comments
28 Apr 08:03
Business

Waiter? There's a mouse in my motherboard and this server is greasy!

ON-CALLSupport chap reveals the squalid horror of restaurant computers
69 Comments
28 Apr 07:28
Security

Kali Linux can now use cloud GPUs for password-cracking

Kali's a favourite for white hats, but that doesn't stop black hats guys from using it too
28 Apr 07:02
Business

That YouTube ad boycott had square-root of sod-all effect on Google's insane cash machine

License to print money renewed in full, thanks to mobile
12 Comments
28 Apr 06:28
Cloud
Blue Origin rocket launch

Amid all the fanfare and cheerleading, Amazon's AWS growth is slowing

'Meteoric' success downgraded to mere 'rocketing'
28 Apr 06:02
Science
brain

Shock horror: US military sticks jump leads on human brains to teach them a lesson

DARPA's current thinking for potential future bright sparks
24 Comments
28 Apr 05:28
Data Centre
Satya Nadella

Scratch the Surface: Slabtop sales slump takes the shine off Microsoft's 2017 so far

Phones also dead – but hey, $53m profit A DAY is still $53m
25 Comments
28 Apr 05:04
Policy

Software woes keep NASA's new crewed missions grounded

Space Launch System and Orion Crew Vehicle won't lift off for planned 2018 test flight
11 Comments
28 Apr 04:10
Software

Phew! Chrome to warn when you watch insecure smut

Google's ongoing HTTP exposé comes to Incognito Mode and forms
23 Comments
28 Apr 03:06
Storage

Arcserve gobbles up email biz to sate hunger for message archiving

We're trying our best here, OK?
28 Apr 02:51

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